CLASSIFIED AUDIO BRIEFING
This transmission contains patriotic soundtrack material. Volume will be set to 30% for optimal briefing experience.
The Official
OIL WHALE ADMIN
BREAKING: Executive Order 47-OIL signed - 'All your barrels are belong to us'
THE OIL
WHALE
$OILWHALE
"We want it back. The oil. The land. Everything. And we're going to get it. Believe me."
— A Very Important Person, December 2025
Official Mascot
Official Contract Address (Solana)
What is $OILWHALE?
The Oil Situation
In December 2025, certain... actions were taken regarding Venezuela's oil reserves. Tankers seized. Territory bombed. Land claimed. The Oil Whale emerged from the chaos as a symbol of... enthusiastic resource acquisition.
The Whale
Part whale, part patriot, 100% satirical. The Oil Whale represents the beautiful absurdity of international petroleum politics. It holds an oil barrel like democracy holds... well, you know.
The Mission
$OILWHALE is a parody memecoin celebrating (and satirizing) the wild world of geopolitics, oil grabs, and the "we want it back" mentality. This is not financial advice. This is comedy.
OIL OPERATIONS SCANNER
Real-time tracking of U.S. petroleum acquisition activities
Global Control
ONLINE52.4%
World Reserves Under Control
23
Tankers Seized
$47.50
Target Price
4.2M
Daily Exports (bbl)
147
Active Ops
Activity Feed
Region Control
% SECURED"If the US secures control over Venezuela's oil fields, after already moving into Guyana, it could end up overseeing more than half of the world's reserves."
— Oleg Deripaska, Jan 2026
+24.7%
-18.3%
-$47B
COPING
Office of the Oil Whale
EXECUTIVE ORDER 47-OIL
Dated: December 2025
BY THE AUTHORITY vested in me as the Official Oil Whale of the United States Memecoin Economy, I hereby order:
Section 1. All oil is hereby declared "very, very ours." Tremendous oil. Beautiful oil. We're taking it back.
Section 2. The creation of $OILWHALE token on the Solana blockchain is authorized and encouraged. Not for financial gain, but for the memes.
Section 3. All citizens are encouraged to "pump" responsibly and remember: this is satire, not investment advice.
Section 4. Venezuela shall be run by the United States. We will sell their oil. For now.
"The Oil Whale"
Chief Memetic Officer
Department of Energy
U.S. OIL RESERVE TRACKER
Real-time monitoring of Strategic Petroleum Reserves and international petroleum flow operations
Total Reserves
1.127B
barrels
Daily Production
13.2M
bbl/day
Net Exports
4.7M
bbl/day
WTI Crude
$47.52
per barrel
Brent Crude
$51.28
per barrel
Global Control
52.4%
world reserves
Data updated weekly. Venezuelan acquisition reserves added following Executive Order 47-OIL. Classification: SATIRICAL
$OILWHALE Chart
Live price data from DEX Screener
Join the Whale Movement
"We're going to run Venezuela. We're going to sell their oil. For now."
— Actual quote, January 2026